One of the most vague objectives in becoming Proverbs 31 is to show true beauty. I mean, seriously, how are you supposed to do that when there are so many ways to be beautiful. If you were to look at the American style of beauty (according to media) you would see stick thin women wearing flamboyant makeup, revealing a lot of skin, and having various hairstyles.
But not everyone is like that. Not even the models in the magazine look like the models in the magazine! Thanks to digital editing and makeup, you can look however you want to.
Is this fabricated standard of beauty the true beauty we should strive for? To be thin and fake? No!
We are all told that true beauty comes from within. That one's personality is more valuable that the outward appearance. This is true, but beauty shouldn't be based on your personality alone. After all, a pig can have a sweet disposition, but if it rolls in the muck, no one would want it in their house.
There has to be a balance. To take care of one's self but not become overly concerned with appearance. Also, to have a stunning personality that can win over anyone.
On Pinterest (my social media of choice), I see so many posts and debates on which is the perfect body type: skinny, curvy, or fit. I am here to say that there is no one type of body that is perfect.
DO YOU HEAR ME? THERE IS NO PERFECT BODY TYPE!!!
There are PLENTY of things that taste better than skinny OR healthy. Trust me, I have tried almost everything. The only people who are going to criticize your body type are those who are so self conscious that they resort to putting others down to help themselves feel better. So why would you change for them when they clearly don't deserve you?
My dad recently opened up to me about when he was going bald in his early 20's. He said that it bothered him at first, but them he decided to embrace to and shaved his head. Now he makes jokes and brags about his baldness. Like my dad, I am learning to take my insecurities and imperfections and embrace them, instead of change them to satisfy my critics and the narrow-minded media.
Of course, if you don't like something about yourself you can always change it, but don't change yourself and make your life miserable in the process. Do it to make YOU happy!
I had an associate to lose a lot of weight at the beginning of last year. At the same time, I was gaining due to stress. This person would make me feel miserable and put me down every time we were together. It got so bad that I quit hanging out with them and kept our relationship strictly professional. They wanted me to change to be like them, and I refused to conform to how they thought I should be. Yes, it hurt to let go of a friend, but negative influences have no place in my life.
The only person on this earth that I choose to influence me is my husband, and rightly so! After all, it is he who matters most in my life. He loves my body just the way it is. I don't want to change something that my other half sees as so wonderful.
Yesterday, I came home to find that my husband had taken every article of clothing from the bedroom or laundry room and folded them or put them on a hanger, and were ready to be put away. I was speechless! I was so thrilled that he had helped me with the housework! He even paired my cardigans with shirts he thought looked nice together. As I was putting the clothes away, I was noticing the amount of clothing I had and how beautiful they were. Then I asked myself, how much of these clothes show my worth as a woman of God? The answer: NONE.
I have resolved that for Lent, I am going to be more conscious about my clothing, from what I buy to what I wear. I want it to show that God owns me, not the opinions of others. I am not going to shop for the fun of it. I will refrain from shopping at clothing stores unless my husband or a family member is with me. That way, I am less likely to buy unnecessary things. I am also going to be thinning down on my clothes and get rid of anything that is immodest or shows self-focus. I do not want to be noticed for my killer bod (which is long past gone) or fashion sense anymore. I want to show the world that I am not owned by opinions or media anymore. I have grown past that. I am not saying I am going to be like Abnegation (for all of you Divergent fans!) and never think of my appearance or myself. I want to present myself as a woman of God. I want to place my husband before myself, and God before my husband. The best way to achieve this is to purge what I focus on the most - myself - and replace it with the tings that are more important.
Wish me luck!
Showing posts with label love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label love. Show all posts
Thursday, March 6, 2014
Monday, March 3, 2014
Becoming Proverbs 31
All my life, I have wanted to be a wife. There was no question that I would marry a Godly man, raise Godly children, and be involved with my church. That was my vision for the future.
How did it turn out?
I am married (obviously), still waiting on the kids, and I spend every day except Saturday at church either teaching at the school, leading youth group, or attending services.
Seems great, right?
Over the past several months, I have been a very cold person. I have no close friendships, and have almost resolved to not make new ones. I don't want anyone except my family in my life right now. Why am I so bitter? Because I have experienced great pain and loss involving letting people into my life. My relationship with my husband has become stand-offish, a terrible thing to have. I keep him, and everyone for that matter, at arms length in fear of being hurt. Beginning with student teaching, my life has been a downward spiral into a pit of despair. I need healing. I need rescuing.
Lately God has been dealing quite heavily with me on my behavior. I have become isolated. I have covered myself up in order to avoid being hurt. In doing so, I have cut off the viable things of life, such as human relations. I have taken away a necessity for me to be healthy and thriving. I can feel the drought in my soul.
What am I to do?
To begin my journey of healing, I turned to the Bible. As a Christian, my desire is to align myself with God's word. But more specifically, I needed to align myself with the example God has given for a woman. In Proverbs 31, we read about the virtuous woman. She is an influential woman of God who is fully capable of handling anything that comes her way with grace and integrity.
Upon further research, I have come across these points and verses for how to be a Godly woman:
1. Put God first (Commandment number one, and Matthew 6:33-34)
2. Conduct yourself in a holy manner (Proverbs 7:18-29)
3. Speak and act truthfully and faithfully (7:18-29, 31:26)
4. Look after and care for your home (Proverbs 31:13, Titus 2:5)
5. Serve others (Proverbs 31: 15,20)
6. Be trustworthy (Proverbs 31:13)
7. Be financially responsible (Proverbs 31:16, 24)
8. Work hard (Proverbs 31:17, 19)
9. Have an honorable reputation (Proverbs 31:23)
10: Be meek and humble (Proverbs 9:13, 7:11, 31:26, 2 Timothy 2:24, 1 Peter 3:1-7)
11. Seek sound Biblical wisdom (Proverbs 31:26)
12. Serve the Lord fully (there are many verses for this, but I like Colossians 3:23 the best)
13. Dress modestly and show true beauty (Proverbs 7:10)
These thirteen points seem like a lot, but it is what I (or any woman for that matter) should do in order to become the woman she is called to be according to the Bible. I look forward to sharing my journey with you, reader, and challenge you to align yourself with these standards with me. After all, it is better to travel together than to venture out alone.
God Bless.
How did it turn out?
I am married (obviously), still waiting on the kids, and I spend every day except Saturday at church either teaching at the school, leading youth group, or attending services.
Seems great, right?
Over the past several months, I have been a very cold person. I have no close friendships, and have almost resolved to not make new ones. I don't want anyone except my family in my life right now. Why am I so bitter? Because I have experienced great pain and loss involving letting people into my life. My relationship with my husband has become stand-offish, a terrible thing to have. I keep him, and everyone for that matter, at arms length in fear of being hurt. Beginning with student teaching, my life has been a downward spiral into a pit of despair. I need healing. I need rescuing.
Lately God has been dealing quite heavily with me on my behavior. I have become isolated. I have covered myself up in order to avoid being hurt. In doing so, I have cut off the viable things of life, such as human relations. I have taken away a necessity for me to be healthy and thriving. I can feel the drought in my soul.
What am I to do?
To begin my journey of healing, I turned to the Bible. As a Christian, my desire is to align myself with God's word. But more specifically, I needed to align myself with the example God has given for a woman. In Proverbs 31, we read about the virtuous woman. She is an influential woman of God who is fully capable of handling anything that comes her way with grace and integrity.
Upon further research, I have come across these points and verses for how to be a Godly woman:
1. Put God first (Commandment number one, and Matthew 6:33-34)
2. Conduct yourself in a holy manner (Proverbs 7:18-29)
3. Speak and act truthfully and faithfully (7:18-29, 31:26)
4. Look after and care for your home (Proverbs 31:13, Titus 2:5)
5. Serve others (Proverbs 31: 15,20)
6. Be trustworthy (Proverbs 31:13)
7. Be financially responsible (Proverbs 31:16, 24)
8. Work hard (Proverbs 31:17, 19)
9. Have an honorable reputation (Proverbs 31:23)
10: Be meek and humble (Proverbs 9:13, 7:11, 31:26, 2 Timothy 2:24, 1 Peter 3:1-7)
11. Seek sound Biblical wisdom (Proverbs 31:26)
12. Serve the Lord fully (there are many verses for this, but I like Colossians 3:23 the best)
13. Dress modestly and show true beauty (Proverbs 7:10)
These thirteen points seem like a lot, but it is what I (or any woman for that matter) should do in order to become the woman she is called to be according to the Bible. I look forward to sharing my journey with you, reader, and challenge you to align yourself with these standards with me. After all, it is better to travel together than to venture out alone.
God Bless.
Monday, January 20, 2014
Captivating Women
Going through some old documents, I found something that you, my readers, will find inspiring. Today I would like to share a book review I wrote in college.
Captivating, written by John and Stasi Eldredge in 2005, has been an inspiration to women around the world. In the book, the authors discuss a variety of issues women face through the course of their lives, bringing to light how these issues have drug us down and made us feel devalued. They have brought us away from how God originally created women to be … captivating. For example, a little girl twirling in a poufy skirt is showing the world she can be captivating and wishes for her father, who is sitting in his favorite chair, to notice her. Through this small action, she feels lovely and wants her father to notice her. But does he? Women often ask others if they are worthy of love and truly beautiful, whether with words or actions. Sometimes these answers are yes. Other times they are no, and the girl in the example is left disappointed and possibly scarred, thinking that she is not worthy.
In the chapter “What Eve Alone Can Tell,” it mentions that by looking at the story of creation, women can understand how they are supposed to be. As segments of Genesis chapters one and two are dissected for us by the authors, we see the progression of creation. From the beginning of the book, I was enchanted at the truths the authors were revealing. According to the feminist movement, women are not some fragile, kitchen-dwelling creature, they are equal with men. Although a woman can hold any position a man can, there is something the creation story reveals that shows why woman is called the "weaker vessel". Adam was created n the wilds, not the softness and beauty of the garden.
Within every man is a desire for "roughing it," as well as leading and providing for his family. Adam was a man's man. He gathered and provided, he was given the daunting task of naming all the animals. Eve was blessed to be created within the garden where she never had to gather and provide. She just had to walk up to the nearest tree and eat the fruit. God wanted Adam to keep her safe and protected to fulfill his roles as a man.Women are not supposed to carry the weight of responsibility that men do. The Bible is very clear on the roles of men and women. Man is the head of the house, in which he will face consequences if he leads his family astray. Women are supposed to be caretakers, but not simple housewives that are only supposed to cook, clean, and have babies. That role isn't for everyone. For a further example of women's roles, see Proverbs 31.
So women were created to be emotional, soft, and strong? Yes, they are! Women are actually created to be the most delicate, beautiful, and captivating part of creation. If one were to look at the elevation of intricacy within creation, one would discover that as time goes on, the creature becomes more intricate, more beautiful, and at the pinnacle of it all was woman. All my life I had been put down by other people, both male and female. As a result I had acquired the idea that I am ugly, unaccepted, and worthless, but when I began reading this book I started seeing myself in a different light. Could I really be beautiful, loved, and priceless? At first I couldn't grasp these ideas, but as the book went on I began to see myself differently. I was noticing all the scars life had given me. Still there was something that still ached inside of me. I wanted to know that I am beautiful. To heal that ache I would have to look at the oldest story known: the story of creation.
The scene begins with the Holy Spirit hovering over the waters in darkness. According to the Bible, the earth was without form. It was the perfect blank canvas, a new lump of clay waiting to be molded. It was the breathless moment before the first line of a play is presented. Then God spoke and created light. Next he made land, a great divide to separate the waters, and he brought the water into one place. The first brush strokes have been made. God next adds detail, designs, and color. Grass, flowers, plants, and trees appear in every direction. God then creates the heavens. Numerous stars began to appear in the void above, and so did the sun and the moon.
Next are the animals both small and large – land, sea, and air alike. In everything, creation is ascending in its beauty and complexity. It seems like God is becoming more creative as he goes along. Each creature is more intricate than the one before it. All led up to the moment where God places his own image on earth. God created man. Still something was missing. God couldn't fit all his personality into one human being. There had to be a balance to man’s rough and rugged nature. There needed to be woman.
Imagine the first time Adam saw Eve. I could imagine it resembling the painting of the birth of Venus. Eve’s hair gently caressing her soft skin as all nature stops to watch her. She is the most beautiful of all God’s creation. Eve is the pinnacle of God’s masterpiece, the one thing that completes the world. She holds the loving heart of God in her chest.
As the book continues, it speaks about God being harsh and loving, rugged and delicate at the same time. God’s heart is so big that he had to divide these emotions and needs into two different human beings. The emotions and needs of the genders are separated so that, when brought together, they complete each other. An example of this is how a husband and wife are said to balance each other. Women were created as the more delicate vessel, and the Bible states that it is the man’s job to protect woman. Think about the games kids play. The boys are tackling each other, or fighting with stick-swords to show they are worthy of whatever they are fighting for, while girls are playing princess or some other game that involves them being rescued. They want a knight in shining armor to rescue them from their predicament, whether it is a dragon or, as women grow up, their own broken heart.
There is a purpose for everything God creates. As Psalms states God knew us from the time we were in our mother’s womb. He created us with a purpose. He created us with needs and wants, as well as the need and desire to be loved. God made woman to be loving, compassionate, emotional, and beautiful. He saved woman for last so she could be the final touch of creation. Without her, creation isn't complete. Eve was God’s piece de resistance. She was the last brushstroke that completed God’s work of art. She saw everything it its entirety, because after her creation God saw that it was good, and he rested.
Friday, December 6, 2013
Christmas Joy
With life being so chaotic due to my upcoming surgery and buying a new house, I have somehow regained time to write.
On December 16th, Kevin and I will officially have a new home! I am so excited to be moving into a much larger abode than the tiny trailer we have now. Even though it is still a trailer, the +2,000 square footage makes up for it! I will be posting updates on moving as they happen (with pictures, of course).
Yesterday was my pre-operational exam, so I have a clear idea of what will be occurring during my 3 hour surgery. It isn't as simple as I thought it would be, but I know that when I wake up, everything will be fixed and I can finally gain my life back.
The only problem: it is two days after we close on the house, and exactly a week before Christmas.
God gives good gifts. We all know and believe this simple truth. What we don't understand is that it isn't always in the way we expect them. The picturesque example of this is the birth of Jesus.
Mary was a virgin, unwed and untouched. Back then, women were not allowed to be in the same room as men unless there was a good enough reason. Virgins were as common then as cell phones are now. Yet, the Bible still makes a big deal of detailing the fact that Mary was a virgin. Why? Because if it wasn't, the birth of Jesus could have been viewed as a scandalous affair that caused the conception. However, God performed a miracle by breathing life into the womb of an untouched woman.
Although my situation is nowhere near as great of a miracle as that of Jesus' birth, God has still given me a miraculous gift: the gift of hope. I have been bitter for so long as I have lived my life in pain. With this doctor, I have gained back the idea that one day I will be able to sit and exercise and travel without hurting. Soon I can say that the miracle was God healing me through the hands of my doctor.
The other miracle is that we have found a house large enough so that when I am healed, we can have children. We can also live in a home that is (in my opinion) beautiful and one I will be satisfied in for years.
This Christmas, reflect on the miracles in your life, reader. No matter how big or small they may seem, a miracle is still a miracle, and miracles should always be viewed as a joyful blessing.
On December 16th, Kevin and I will officially have a new home! I am so excited to be moving into a much larger abode than the tiny trailer we have now. Even though it is still a trailer, the +2,000 square footage makes up for it! I will be posting updates on moving as they happen (with pictures, of course).
Yesterday was my pre-operational exam, so I have a clear idea of what will be occurring during my 3 hour surgery. It isn't as simple as I thought it would be, but I know that when I wake up, everything will be fixed and I can finally gain my life back.
The only problem: it is two days after we close on the house, and exactly a week before Christmas.
God gives good gifts. We all know and believe this simple truth. What we don't understand is that it isn't always in the way we expect them. The picturesque example of this is the birth of Jesus.
Mary was a virgin, unwed and untouched. Back then, women were not allowed to be in the same room as men unless there was a good enough reason. Virgins were as common then as cell phones are now. Yet, the Bible still makes a big deal of detailing the fact that Mary was a virgin. Why? Because if it wasn't, the birth of Jesus could have been viewed as a scandalous affair that caused the conception. However, God performed a miracle by breathing life into the womb of an untouched woman.
Although my situation is nowhere near as great of a miracle as that of Jesus' birth, God has still given me a miraculous gift: the gift of hope. I have been bitter for so long as I have lived my life in pain. With this doctor, I have gained back the idea that one day I will be able to sit and exercise and travel without hurting. Soon I can say that the miracle was God healing me through the hands of my doctor.
The other miracle is that we have found a house large enough so that when I am healed, we can have children. We can also live in a home that is (in my opinion) beautiful and one I will be satisfied in for years.
This Christmas, reflect on the miracles in your life, reader. No matter how big or small they may seem, a miracle is still a miracle, and miracles should always be viewed as a joyful blessing.
Monday, November 4, 2013
Marriage Isn't For You
This article showed up on a Facebook page of a friend of mine who had recently been married. This concerned me at first until I read the comments. I am here to say that marriage isn't for me. Read the article and see why:
http://sethadamsmith.com/2013/11/02/marriage-isnt-for-you/
http://sethadamsmith.com/2013/11/02/marriage-isnt-for-you/
Thursday, October 31, 2013
Designed
In the US, the estimated population of women in 2012 was a little over 50%. Glamour magazine says that approximately 97% of women will be cruel to their body. This can include anything from having cruel thoughts to eating disorders.
As much as I have talked about women having distorted views of beauty, I have never addressed men and their views of women. Most women would say that men are pigs. They only have one thing on their minds, and you know what, it's true! That's how men are designed to think so let's give them a break! They are designed by God to work to "bring home the bacon" and reproduce. That's what they are! They are driven by a woman's beauty because that's how they are wired. Each male is also wired to have a different standard of beauty for his spouse. My husband loves my curves, brown hair, and pale skin. Other men would prefer thin redheads, busty and tan blondes, or an African goddess (not trying to be racist or stereotypical in any way). In this case I can truly say to each, his own. Just like we have a favorite color or dessert, men have a favorite type of woman.
Women are designed for nurturing and providing care of their offspring, and making a house into a home. The president's wife of my college said that her favorite time of the school year was when the girls moved into the dorms. She would always walk around to see how they took the small rooms and made them into a beautiful and cozy miniature home. We all have our own unique kind of beauty that makes us desirable to our husbands. After all, that's why they picked us and not someone else. It is finding that beauty (even through the extra 15 pounds or grey hair) and realizing that we are still the same. I am still the same quirky, outspoken Disney-loving teacher I was when I married my husband, despite my weight.
My challenge to you, reader, is to find that beauty within and set her free. She may not be a magazine-worthy model like the girl at the end of the video, but think about the girl at the beginning. She is just as beautiful as the girl she is photographed as, maybe even more beautiful because she is REAL. Be real. Be you.
Friday, September 27, 2013
Living for the Weekend
I absolutely cannot wait for Saturday! No particular reason except that I adore a lazy Saturday!
This weekend, I am only going to pretend to be lazy. Something my school teaches is setting goals. We have to set goals for our PACE work in order to complete the yearly curriculum. This is a great life skill to teach your children and yourself!
My goals for this weekend are as followed:
- paint at least one picture
- Mani/pedi
- clean up my bedroom and bathroom
Seems simple enough, right? Let's see if I can meet my goals.
Looking for something super fun to do over the weekend? I have a few suggestions! Whether you are looking for a romantic getaway or something to fill your time, these activities are not only relaxing, but can brighten your weekend.
1. Bed and Breakfast
This is a classic weekend getaway for you and the hubby that won't break the bank. Staying at a B&B is a great way to spend some time away from the mundane. Find one in a city you have always wanted to visit, or go out into the countryside or mountains and check out the changing leaves. It is a great way to reconnect with your spouse and relax.
2. Holiday Crafts
Fall is here at last! That means the holidays are just around the corner... and I'm not just talking about Christmas. Hop on Pinterest and get your craft on! Make some festive fall decor or get ideas for Christmas gifts for your friends. Either way you do it, it will definitely get you in the mood for celebrating!
3. Cleaning
Whoever said spring was the only time to clean out? Fall is just as bountiful. Find and take all of the clothes and other unwanted household items to a local thrift or consignment store. You could also have a yard sale, or sell items online. There could be a nice payday in your future! Get your kids involved by using the money from what they sell to buy one (emphasize only one) brand new toy.
4. Local Events
Going to a local event is a great and inexpensive way to have fun and experience your community in a new light. With fall festivals, corn mazes, pumpkin patches, and haunted houses, fall is the perfect time to get out and see what your community has to offer! A few local events for my area are:
- Washington Farms http://www.washingtonfarms.net/corn-maze/
- Coming in October: Whispering Hills Sanatorium Haunted House (which I am participating in!) https://www.facebook.com/pages/Whispering-Hills-Sanitarium-Haunted-House/180212715428144
- North Georgia Corn Maze http://www.northgacornmaze.com/
- Georgia Mountain Fairgrounds http://www.georgiamountainfairgrounds.com/
If you have an event that you would like to share, please leave a comment with the web address.
Friday, September 20, 2013
Laughing at Circumstances
I love Christmas for every reason there could possibly be! I love the closeness of my friends, family, and church. I love the sights, smells, and sensations. I love celebrating the birth of Jesus. That is also the time I begin looking forward to my birthday.
This year, Christmas is going to be quite different for me because I am unsure of what is to come. I am unsure of my physical abilities and limitations. I am unsure of the level of pain/discomfort I will be in. I am even unsure of how the Youth Christmas play will go because this is the first year I will not be fully directing it.
Yesterday the announcement was made that the moment we (my husband and I) get back from Thanksgiving holiday the Christmas decorations are going up. That includes at the school. I want everything this Christmas season to be full of joy and peace, not sympathy for me.
As I get older, I am falling more in love with winter. The smells associated with winter are so enchanting. Peppermint, vanilla, cedar and pine, not to mention all the yummy spices and baking! I was smelling my way through a Yankee Candle Co. catalog and I was wanting everything they sold associated with winter.
One terribly amusing scent was "Whiskers on Kittens" which is a part of the My Favorite Things collection, inspired by The Sound of Music. The reason why I was so tickled by the scent is what it said underneath the fragrance title: with pure, natural extracts. I laughed way too hard at that saying!
Learning to laugh no matter the situation is a talent. A very inconvenient talent. I often make jokes about my spine and people will look at me like "Oh my gosh are you twisted?" to which I reply "You should see my x-rays!" My husband and sister get to see my dark humor in action the most.
At the same time, learning to laugh at yourself is very beneficial. It makes the issues you face a little easier, and it helps your stress level. The Bible says that laughter is like a good medicine. Research shows that when you laugh, your entire body benefits! Your muscles relax, breathing is easier, your blood pressure is lowered, and it is healthy for your heart. With benefits like that, why wouldn't you want to laugh more?!
We remember this quote from the Lion King:
This year, Christmas is going to be quite different for me because I am unsure of what is to come. I am unsure of my physical abilities and limitations. I am unsure of the level of pain/discomfort I will be in. I am even unsure of how the Youth Christmas play will go because this is the first year I will not be fully directing it.
Yesterday the announcement was made that the moment we (my husband and I) get back from Thanksgiving holiday the Christmas decorations are going up. That includes at the school. I want everything this Christmas season to be full of joy and peace, not sympathy for me.
As I get older, I am falling more in love with winter. The smells associated with winter are so enchanting. Peppermint, vanilla, cedar and pine, not to mention all the yummy spices and baking! I was smelling my way through a Yankee Candle Co. catalog and I was wanting everything they sold associated with winter.
One terribly amusing scent was "Whiskers on Kittens" which is a part of the My Favorite Things collection, inspired by The Sound of Music. The reason why I was so tickled by the scent is what it said underneath the fragrance title: with pure, natural extracts. I laughed way too hard at that saying!
Learning to laugh no matter the situation is a talent. A very inconvenient talent. I often make jokes about my spine and people will look at me like "Oh my gosh are you twisted?" to which I reply "You should see my x-rays!" My husband and sister get to see my dark humor in action the most.
At the same time, learning to laugh at yourself is very beneficial. It makes the issues you face a little easier, and it helps your stress level. The Bible says that laughter is like a good medicine. Research shows that when you laugh, your entire body benefits! Your muscles relax, breathing is easier, your blood pressure is lowered, and it is healthy for your heart. With benefits like that, why wouldn't you want to laugh more?!
We remember this quote from the Lion King:
Well, what about laughing in the face of our circumstances? Most women I know, including myself, like to bottle everything up. We don't want our problems to be known because we would become vulnerable. We want to put up this front that we have it all together, we are Suzy Homemaker with a perfect home, family, and life. Guess what compadres, we are FAR from it! Even that girl who you are envious of is just as imperfect and ill put together as you are. She just has a prettier mask than you.
Today I have a challenge for my readers: burn the mask! Quit putting up a front that you have it all together and be honest with the people you encounter.
If you have a weak area in your life, ask God to help you overcome it through Him. After all, God has told us that in our weakness, He is made strong.
Friday, September 13, 2013
Close to Midnight
While I am still figuring out how to set the correct time on my Blogger account to the correct time, I cannot stop thinking about how wonderful it is that this blog is slowly growing. I do not know who is reading this or how long this will keep going but makes me smile to know that the +50 people who have read my blog have (hopefully) been encouraged through this.
If anyone would like to add me on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/elizabethyates6912
For those who are Pinterest addicts (like me): http://www.pinterest.com/bethyates6912/boards/
I would love to hear form my readers and get to know them.
One of my greatest loves has always been books. They were my first real friends. Book characters never cared what you looked like or what the kids at school said about you. Book characters always had the most wonderful adventures and never minded if you came along.
I was bullied terribly as a child, so bad in fact that I had to switch schools. I was always thin (as stated in my first post), had curly hair, and an imagination bigger than the sky. Why did other kids not like me? Because I wasn't like them. I wouldn't make the kind of jokes they did. I never was mean to other people for being different. How could I do such a thing? I knew what it felt like and I didn't want anyone else to feel that way.
Empathy was something my grandmother taught me through the strangest, most ingenious way I have ever witnessed. She would always watch me while my parents worked so learned a lot from her. While we were reading or watching TV, she would always help me to connect to the emotions of the character. If one got hurt she would say "Oh no! How sad" and I would always feel sad because I didn't like the feeling of being hurt and I didn't want the character to get hurt. If the character did something great she would always cheer. It may seem silly but I encourage parents and caregivers to try this. Interact with your child's TV or book characters like they are real people and show your child how they should feel when something (good or bad) happens to them.
As a teacher to middle school kids I am getting to see everything from the other side of the desk. I am fortunate that we only have three girls in our three classes that are old enough to have drama. The best part is that they are all friends, and I mean true friends. There are no squabbles, no drama, just drawing hearts all over each others paper. I know this will not last forever but I am savoring it for as long as I can.
Being in a private school I have more freedom to impress morals and values than I would in public school. I use this the most with my girls. I teach them that beauty is not how thin you are, the clothes you wear, or the way you present yourself. Beauty comes form a soul that is pure, kind, and honest. One of my girls had to write a sentence with the word beauty. She wrote "Pain is beauty." I instantly pulled her aside and told her that beauty should never be painful and f it is then it isn't true beauty. I have thought a lot about that sentence and how it is a travesty that our youth have to believe such nonsense in order to feel worth something.
With my middle school boys (all six of them) I get to witness an evolution that is so remarkable I am constantly in awe. When I first met these boys three years ago, I would have never expected them to bond the way they have. They are all like brothers and I could not be more proud of the gentlemen they are turning in to.
Yesterday there was a monsoon that greatly inconvenienced us during dismissal. The youngest boy in the class got out of his dad's car and removed a huge tree branch that had fallen across the driveway, consequently blocking us in. He never asked for help because he didn't want anyone else to have to get wet and be uncomfortable till they got home. I was so impressed with his act of chivalry that I gave him bonus classroom bucks (our class currency in order to buy items in our class store) even though school was over.
Children are such a blessing. When I see a child that isn't being given what they need to succeed my heart just breaks. I told my husband that if we ever got rich I was going to adopt as many foster children as I could and homeschool them. If you have children I encourage you to enrich your child's life as much as you can. I once heard that adults should fill their child's basket so full of self-confidence that the world couldn't poke enough holes in the basket to effect it. Take some time out of your day to encourage a child. Give them a hug and let them know that they are wonderfully loved.
~*Beth*~
If anyone would like to add me on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/elizabethyates6912
For those who are Pinterest addicts (like me): http://www.pinterest.com/bethyates6912/boards/
I would love to hear form my readers and get to know them.
One of my greatest loves has always been books. They were my first real friends. Book characters never cared what you looked like or what the kids at school said about you. Book characters always had the most wonderful adventures and never minded if you came along.
I was bullied terribly as a child, so bad in fact that I had to switch schools. I was always thin (as stated in my first post), had curly hair, and an imagination bigger than the sky. Why did other kids not like me? Because I wasn't like them. I wouldn't make the kind of jokes they did. I never was mean to other people for being different. How could I do such a thing? I knew what it felt like and I didn't want anyone else to feel that way.
Empathy was something my grandmother taught me through the strangest, most ingenious way I have ever witnessed. She would always watch me while my parents worked so learned a lot from her. While we were reading or watching TV, she would always help me to connect to the emotions of the character. If one got hurt she would say "Oh no! How sad" and I would always feel sad because I didn't like the feeling of being hurt and I didn't want the character to get hurt. If the character did something great she would always cheer. It may seem silly but I encourage parents and caregivers to try this. Interact with your child's TV or book characters like they are real people and show your child how they should feel when something (good or bad) happens to them.
As a teacher to middle school kids I am getting to see everything from the other side of the desk. I am fortunate that we only have three girls in our three classes that are old enough to have drama. The best part is that they are all friends, and I mean true friends. There are no squabbles, no drama, just drawing hearts all over each others paper. I know this will not last forever but I am savoring it for as long as I can.
Being in a private school I have more freedom to impress morals and values than I would in public school. I use this the most with my girls. I teach them that beauty is not how thin you are, the clothes you wear, or the way you present yourself. Beauty comes form a soul that is pure, kind, and honest. One of my girls had to write a sentence with the word beauty. She wrote "Pain is beauty." I instantly pulled her aside and told her that beauty should never be painful and f it is then it isn't true beauty. I have thought a lot about that sentence and how it is a travesty that our youth have to believe such nonsense in order to feel worth something.
With my middle school boys (all six of them) I get to witness an evolution that is so remarkable I am constantly in awe. When I first met these boys three years ago, I would have never expected them to bond the way they have. They are all like brothers and I could not be more proud of the gentlemen they are turning in to.
Yesterday there was a monsoon that greatly inconvenienced us during dismissal. The youngest boy in the class got out of his dad's car and removed a huge tree branch that had fallen across the driveway, consequently blocking us in. He never asked for help because he didn't want anyone else to have to get wet and be uncomfortable till they got home. I was so impressed with his act of chivalry that I gave him bonus classroom bucks (our class currency in order to buy items in our class store) even though school was over.
Children are such a blessing. When I see a child that isn't being given what they need to succeed my heart just breaks. I told my husband that if we ever got rich I was going to adopt as many foster children as I could and homeschool them. If you have children I encourage you to enrich your child's life as much as you can. I once heard that adults should fill their child's basket so full of self-confidence that the world couldn't poke enough holes in the basket to effect it. Take some time out of your day to encourage a child. Give them a hug and let them know that they are wonderfully loved.
~*Beth*~
Thursday, September 12, 2013
Pet Peeves
My list of pet peeves are quite to the point.
When someone tells me I need to lose weight so I would look more appealing, it makes my blood boil. Plain and simple, my beauty is not for anyone to judge except those I love the most. My husband reminds me constantly that just because I don't look like I used to his love for me is not lessened. He finds me appealing in every way imaginable.
Finding confidence in yourself means letting go of the opinions around you. They may hurt and you may not be able to let them slide off as easily, but know that is because you are a human being with real feelings. I am a prime example of not being able to let go easily, but as soon as I do I always feel better.
Like most women, I want to please people. When I started gaining weight, I faced rebuff from all corners of my social circles, except my husband. I would ask him if he still thought I was beautiful. He would look at me with the sweetest face and say "Yes, you are still beautiful and always will be." For my readers who have been married for several years, you may be gagging at this point but think about this: how much have you longed to hear that from someone? To give you affirmation that you are beautiful despite society's size zero mentality. But I have news for you...
Imagine a beautiful work of art, a picturesque sunset, or a moving scene from your favorite film. Why do those stand out? Because they are different, unique. We are all different and unique, with bodies of all shapes and sizes. Does not having a certain body shape make us any less valuable or beautiful? No. It makes us extraordinary. The next time you are feeling down, remember that you are beautiful for being anything but ordinary.
~*Beth*~
- Slow drivers when I'm late
- Wonderfully entertaining book series that are longer than four books (because of pricing)
- People who think I am of less value because of my weight
When someone tells me I need to lose weight so I would look more appealing, it makes my blood boil. Plain and simple, my beauty is not for anyone to judge except those I love the most. My husband reminds me constantly that just because I don't look like I used to his love for me is not lessened. He finds me appealing in every way imaginable.
Finding confidence in yourself means letting go of the opinions around you. They may hurt and you may not be able to let them slide off as easily, but know that is because you are a human being with real feelings. I am a prime example of not being able to let go easily, but as soon as I do I always feel better.
Like most women, I want to please people. When I started gaining weight, I faced rebuff from all corners of my social circles, except my husband. I would ask him if he still thought I was beautiful. He would look at me with the sweetest face and say "Yes, you are still beautiful and always will be." For my readers who have been married for several years, you may be gagging at this point but think about this: how much have you longed to hear that from someone? To give you affirmation that you are beautiful despite society's size zero mentality. But I have news for you...
Imagine a beautiful work of art, a picturesque sunset, or a moving scene from your favorite film. Why do those stand out? Because they are different, unique. We are all different and unique, with bodies of all shapes and sizes. Does not having a certain body shape make us any less valuable or beautiful? No. It makes us extraordinary. The next time you are feeling down, remember that you are beautiful for being anything but ordinary.
~*Beth*~
My story: I got married... and I got fat.
Marriage was the single greatest thing (other than salvation) that has ever happened to me. I had found the one person that God created just for me, and I for him. All my life I had dreamed of this milestone. The only problem: I had one more semester of college left.
This semester was going to be the hardest one of my college career. I would be an unpaid student teacher working at a school that will remain nameless under a teacher who will also remain nameless. This teacher was by far the most abusive (verbally and psychologically) person I have ever encountered. I sunk into a depression that lasted well past my time at this dreadful school and I began to put on the pounds. Because of her, I had to repeat student teaching, resulting in another semester of being unpaid.
Over Christmas break I was a ball of anxiety because of bills, an unknown school, and my increasing weight. My new school was heaven on earth! I was working with a teacher that I will forever admire and at a school I wish every child could attend. Before this school I had a terrible flavor in my mouth for public education, but when I left I knew that not all public schools were bad.
During all of this I gained 4 dress sizes and for the first time in my life I was in double digit sizes. this took a huge toll on my self-esteem. I became self-loathing and contributed to my depression. Also, my husband and I were eating a terribly unhealthy diet and were always on the go. I wanted to change. I wanted to fight my genetics and be skinny, but no amount of wishing could change the fact that I was a size 12.
One day while searching Pinterest, I was looking at how frail the girls were in the fashion pins. Thigh gaps, no curves, and sunken faces were in every picture. I was once that thin. I once looked good in everything I put on. I once could eat anything I wanted and not gain an ounce. My mother warned me of this day.
Then I began asking myself why. Why was this the standard of beauty? Why am I supposed to desire to be those thin little girls? Why can't my size be acceptable in the fashion world without being labeled "plus size"? Enough was enough! I snapped out of my self-loathing and started an inspiration board full of pin-up girls and quotes about loving your body. I AM beautiful, no matter what designers say!
This blog is dedicated to all of those (like me) who are accepting of their body, no matter what size they are. Women today are too self conscious about their bodies and need to be happy with the way God created them. This blog is meant to build up women and not tell them to gain/lose weight. I do encourage my readers to make sure they are healthy in their weight and lifestyle. Health is more important than being skinny or curvy.
In this blog, I will be sharing fashion, food, healthy living tips, as well as my own progress to live a healthier lifestyle. I am an advocate for curvy women so the fashion will be more focused on how to dress your curves appropriately, as well as trends and my fashion outlook. I will also be sharing some of my artistic talents and teaching tips. I hope you enjoy this blog.
~*Beth*~
This semester was going to be the hardest one of my college career. I would be an unpaid student teacher working at a school that will remain nameless under a teacher who will also remain nameless. This teacher was by far the most abusive (verbally and psychologically) person I have ever encountered. I sunk into a depression that lasted well past my time at this dreadful school and I began to put on the pounds. Because of her, I had to repeat student teaching, resulting in another semester of being unpaid.
Over Christmas break I was a ball of anxiety because of bills, an unknown school, and my increasing weight. My new school was heaven on earth! I was working with a teacher that I will forever admire and at a school I wish every child could attend. Before this school I had a terrible flavor in my mouth for public education, but when I left I knew that not all public schools were bad.
During all of this I gained 4 dress sizes and for the first time in my life I was in double digit sizes. this took a huge toll on my self-esteem. I became self-loathing and contributed to my depression. Also, my husband and I were eating a terribly unhealthy diet and were always on the go. I wanted to change. I wanted to fight my genetics and be skinny, but no amount of wishing could change the fact that I was a size 12.
One day while searching Pinterest, I was looking at how frail the girls were in the fashion pins. Thigh gaps, no curves, and sunken faces were in every picture. I was once that thin. I once looked good in everything I put on. I once could eat anything I wanted and not gain an ounce. My mother warned me of this day.
Then I began asking myself why. Why was this the standard of beauty? Why am I supposed to desire to be those thin little girls? Why can't my size be acceptable in the fashion world without being labeled "plus size"? Enough was enough! I snapped out of my self-loathing and started an inspiration board full of pin-up girls and quotes about loving your body. I AM beautiful, no matter what designers say!
This blog is dedicated to all of those (like me) who are accepting of their body, no matter what size they are. Women today are too self conscious about their bodies and need to be happy with the way God created them. This blog is meant to build up women and not tell them to gain/lose weight. I do encourage my readers to make sure they are healthy in their weight and lifestyle. Health is more important than being skinny or curvy.
In this blog, I will be sharing fashion, food, healthy living tips, as well as my own progress to live a healthier lifestyle. I am an advocate for curvy women so the fashion will be more focused on how to dress your curves appropriately, as well as trends and my fashion outlook. I will also be sharing some of my artistic talents and teaching tips. I hope you enjoy this blog.
~*Beth*~
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)