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Thursday, September 12, 2013

My story: I got married... and I got fat.

Marriage was the single greatest thing (other than salvation) that has ever happened to me. I had found the one person that God created just for me, and I for him. All my life I had dreamed of this milestone. The only problem: I had one more semester of college left.

This semester was going to be the hardest one of my college career. I would be an unpaid student teacher working at a school that will remain nameless under a teacher who will also remain nameless. This teacher was by far the most abusive (verbally and psychologically) person I have ever encountered. I sunk into a depression that lasted well past my time at this dreadful school and I began to put on the pounds. Because of her, I had to repeat student teaching, resulting in another semester of being unpaid.

Over Christmas break I was a ball of anxiety because of bills, an unknown school, and my increasing weight. My new school was heaven on earth! I was working with a teacher that I will forever admire and at a school I wish every child could attend. Before this school I had a terrible flavor in my mouth for public education, but when I left I knew that not all public schools were bad.

During all of this I gained 4 dress sizes and for the first time in my life I was in double digit sizes. this took a huge toll on my self-esteem. I became self-loathing and contributed to my depression. Also, my husband and I were eating a terribly unhealthy diet and were always on the go. I wanted to change. I wanted to fight my genetics and be skinny, but no amount of wishing could change the fact that I was a size 12.

One day while searching Pinterest, I was looking at how frail the girls were in the fashion pins. Thigh gaps, no curves, and sunken faces were in every picture. I was once that thin. I once looked good in everything I put on. I once could eat anything I wanted and not gain an ounce. My mother warned me of this day.

Then I began asking myself why. Why was this the standard of beauty? Why am I supposed to desire to be those thin little girls? Why can't my size be acceptable in the fashion world without being labeled "plus size"? Enough was enough! I snapped out of my self-loathing and started an inspiration board full of pin-up girls and quotes about loving your body. I AM beautiful, no matter what designers say!

This blog is dedicated to all of those (like me) who are accepting of their body, no matter what size they are. Women today are too self conscious about their bodies and need to be happy with the way God created them. This blog is meant to build up women and not tell them to gain/lose weight. I do encourage my readers to make sure they are healthy in their weight and lifestyle. Health is more important than being skinny or curvy.

In this blog, I will be sharing fashion, food, healthy living tips, as well as my own progress to live a healthier lifestyle. I am an advocate for curvy women so the fashion will be more focused on how to dress your curves appropriately, as well as trends and my fashion outlook. I will also be sharing some of my artistic talents and teaching tips. I hope you enjoy this blog.


1 comment:

  1. Great post and an even better attitude. I've fought my curves my whole life...maybe there is hope for a happier future for me after all.