Without Knowing

Today, I got a phone call from my dad during school. He asked for me and my sister to go somewhere private so we could talk. The last time that happened, he told me that my cousin, Caleb, had died. I was extremely nervous about what he was about to say.

When we had gotten into his office, he proceeded to tell about my grandmother who had been tested for the cancer gene that was passed down through the females of the family. If the test were to come back positive, it would be a death sentence for me. I would be a time bomb for cancer. My aunt (her daughter) had passed way from cancer in her 40's, and my grandmother was suffering through a second round of cancer. My dad was more than certain of what the test results would be.

My dad is a pastor, so he did what came naturally to him: he prayed. For two weeks, he kept this news from me while he prayed, asking God for a miracle.

The test came back negative. That's right, NEGATIVE! I do not have the gene!

Even though I was unknowing to this, I am elated! My dad was in disbelief as well. He just knew that my grandmother had the gene, and that he would have to be the bearer of such terrible news. However, I would like to bring into remembrance the following Bible verses:

 2 Chronicles 7: 14

If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.

2 Thessalonians 3:3

But the Lord is faithful. He will establish you and guard you against the evil one.

God was healing me without my knowing. My dad was praying for a miracle without my knowing. I was given grace without having to ask.

My God is still one of miracles!

Becoming Proverbs 31

All my life, I have wanted to be a wife. There was no question that I would marry a Godly man, raise Godly children, and be involved with my church. That was my vision for the future.

How did it turn out?

I am married (obviously), still waiting on the kids, and I spend every day except Saturday at church either teaching at the school, leading youth group, or attending services.

Seems great, right?

Over the past several months, I have been a very cold person. I have no close friendships, and have almost resolved to not make new ones. I don't want anyone except my family in my life right now. Why am I so bitter? Because I have experienced great pain and loss involving letting people into my life. My relationship with my husband has become stand-offish, a terrible thing to have. I keep him, and everyone for that matter, at arms length in fear of being hurt. Beginning with student teaching, my life has been a downward spiral into a pit of despair. I need healing. I need rescuing.

Lately God has been dealing quite heavily with me on my behavior. I have become isolated. I have covered myself up in order to avoid being hurt. In doing so, I have cut off the viable things of life, such as human relations. I have taken away a necessity for me to be healthy and thriving. I can feel the drought in my soul.

What am I to do?

To begin my journey of healing, I turned to the Bible. As a Christian, my desire is to align myself with God's word. But more specifically, I needed to align myself with the example God has given for a woman. In Proverbs 31, we read about the virtuous woman. She is an influential woman of God who is fully capable of handling anything that comes her way with grace and integrity.

Upon further research, I have come across these points and verses for how to be a Godly woman:

1. Put God first (Commandment number one, and Matthew 6:33-34)
2. Conduct yourself in a holy manner (Proverbs 7:18-29)
3. Speak and act truthfully and faithfully (7:18-29, 31:26)
4. Look after and care for your home (Proverbs 31:13, Titus 2:5)
5. Serve others (Proverbs 31: 15,20)
6. Be trustworthy (Proverbs 31:13)
7. Be financially responsible (Proverbs 31:16, 24)
8. Work hard (Proverbs 31:17, 19)
9. Have an honorable reputation (Proverbs 31:23)
10: Be meek and humble (Proverbs 9:13, 7:11, 31:26, 2 Timothy 2:24, 1 Peter 3:1-7)
11. Seek sound Biblical wisdom (Proverbs 31:26)
12. Serve the Lord fully (there are many verses for this, but I like Colossians 3:23 the best)
13.  Dress modestly and show true beauty (Proverbs 7:10)

These thirteen points seem like a lot, but it is what I (or any woman for that matter) should do in order to become the woman she is called to be according to the Bible. I look forward to sharing my journey with you, reader, and challenge you to align yourself with these standards with me. After all, it is better to travel together than to venture out alone.

God Bless.

Captivating Women

Going through some old documents, I found something that you, my readers, will find inspiring. Today I would like to share a book review I wrote in college.

Captivating, written by John and Stasi Eldredge in 2005, has been an inspiration to women around the world. In the book, the authors discuss a variety of issues women face through the course of their lives, bringing to light how these issues have drug us down and made us feel devalued. They have brought us away from how God originally created women to be … captivating. For example, a little girl twirling in a poufy skirt is showing the world she can be captivating and wishes for her father, who is sitting in his favorite chair, to notice her. Through this small action, she feels lovely and wants her father to notice her. But does he? Women often ask others if they are worthy of love and truly beautiful, whether with words or actions. Sometimes these answers are yes. Other times they are no, and the girl in the example is left disappointed and possibly scarred, thinking that she is not worthy.

In the chapter “What Eve Alone Can Tell,” it mentions that by looking at the story of creation, women can understand how they are supposed to be. As segments of Genesis chapters one and two are dissected for us by the authors, we see the progression of creation. From the beginning of the book, I was enchanted at the truths the authors were revealing. According to the feminist movement, women are not some fragile, kitchen-dwelling creature, they are equal with men. Although a woman can hold any position a man can, there is something the creation story reveals that shows why woman is called the "weaker vessel". Adam was created n the wilds, not the softness and beauty of the garden. 

Within every man is a desire for "roughing it," as well as leading and providing for his family. Adam was a man's man. He gathered and provided, he was given the daunting task of naming all the animals. Eve was blessed to be created within the garden where she never had to gather and provide. She just had to walk up to the nearest tree and eat the fruit. God wanted Adam to keep her safe and protected to fulfill his roles as a man.Women are not supposed to carry the weight of responsibility that men do. The Bible is very clear on the roles of men and women. Man is the head of the house, in which he will face consequences if he leads his family astray. Women are supposed to be caretakers, but not simple housewives that are only supposed to cook, clean, and have babies. That role isn't for everyone. For a further example of women's roles, see Proverbs 31.

So women were created to be emotional, soft, and strong? Yes, they are! Women are actually created to be the most delicate, beautiful, and captivating part of creation. If one were to look at the elevation of intricacy within creation, one would discover that as time goes on, the creature becomes more intricate, more beautiful, and at the pinnacle of it all was woman. All my life I had been put down by other people, both male and female. As a result I had acquired the idea that I am ugly, unaccepted, and worthless, but when I began reading this book I started seeing myself in a different light. Could I really be beautiful, loved, and priceless? At first I couldn't grasp these ideas, but as the book went on I began to see myself differently. I was noticing all the scars life had given me. Still there was something that still ached inside of me. I wanted to know that I am beautiful. To heal that ache I would have to look at the oldest story known: the story of creation. 

The scene begins with the Holy Spirit hovering over the waters in darkness. According to the Bible, the earth was without form. It was the perfect blank canvas, a new lump of clay waiting to be molded. It was the breathless moment before the first line of a play is presented. Then God spoke and created light. Next he made land, a great divide to separate the waters, and he brought the water into one place. The first brush strokes have been made. God next adds detail, designs, and color. Grass, flowers, plants, and trees appear in every direction. God then creates the heavens. Numerous stars began to appear in the void above, and so did the sun and the moon. 

Next are the animals both small and large – land, sea, and air alike. In everything, creation is ascending in its beauty and complexity. It seems like God is becoming more creative as he goes along. Each creature is more intricate than the one before it. All led up to the moment where God places his own image on earth. God created man. Still something was missing. God couldn't fit all his personality into one human being. There had to be a balance to man’s rough and rugged nature. There needed to be woman. 

Imagine the first time Adam saw Eve. I could imagine it resembling the painting of the birth of Venus. Eve’s hair gently caressing her soft skin as all nature stops to watch her. She is the most beautiful of all God’s creation. Eve is the pinnacle of God’s masterpiece, the one thing that completes the world. She holds the loving heart of God in her chest.

As the book continues, it speaks about God being harsh and loving, rugged and delicate at the same time. God’s heart is so big that he had to divide these emotions and needs into two different human beings. The emotions and needs of the genders are separated so that, when brought together, they complete each other. An example of this is how a husband and wife are said to balance each other. Women were created as the more delicate vessel, and the Bible states that it is the man’s job to protect woman. Think about the games kids play. The boys are tackling each other, or fighting with stick-swords to show they are worthy of whatever they are fighting for, while girls are playing princess or some other game that involves them being rescued. They want a knight in shining armor to rescue them from their predicament, whether it is a dragon or, as women grow up, their own broken heart. 

There is a purpose for everything God creates. As Psalms states God knew us from the time we were in our mother’s womb. He created us with a purpose. He created us with needs and wants, as well as the need and desire to be loved. God made woman to be loving, compassionate, emotional, and beautiful. He saved woman for last so she could be the final touch of creation. Without her, creation isn't complete. Eve was God’s piece de resistance. She was the last brushstroke that completed God’s work of art. She saw everything it its entirety, because after her creation God saw that it was good, and he rested.

Antonyms

Packing: my least favorite thing about moving.

Decorating: my dad's least favorite part of Christmas.

All of this is happening this week.

My sixth graders have been studying antonyms this semester and I can definitely say that my life right now is a giant antonym. Everything is so opposite than what it is supposed to be. Instead of unpacking box after box and decorating the house, I am putting my entire life into boxes.

And if that wasn't enough, I will be having my surgery two days after we close on the house, meaning I will not get to move any of the boxes, furniture, or other items in our house. I have to rely on my family and friends to help.

Christmas in America is all about the stuff: how much more you have than your neighbor, and how much better the gifts and decorations are than last year. Every commercial, every TV show and movie all focus on this drive for being better. But as we all know, this isn't what Christmas is about.

While boxing things up today, I was able to take a brief inventory of all the material goods God has blessed my husband and I with. It was a very sobering experience.

This Christmas season, take inventory of your blessings and count the ways God has blessed you.

To Whoever Prayed...

I do not believe in coincidences. I believe that God ordains everything.

To whoever prayed after reading my last post, know that your prayers were not in vain. My dad, the pastor, came in and we started a discussion because of a comment the student I mentioned earlier made regarding thee Bible. From there we expounded on every topic we had been discussing in devotion, especially salvation and proving the Bible as true. Tomorrow we will host a very special chapel answering questions from students.

Keep praying, readers.

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Georgia in the Fall

Today is Friday... and super cold for this time of year. I woke up to 45 degrees, which is unheard of in Georgia for fall. Luckily, I live in a mobile home with such good insulation I don't have to worry about ANY air escaping. Unfortunately, this includes cold air. I told my parents last night that I know it is fall when I dread leaving the room that the heater is running in.

With this new development in weather, I also have to accommodate my wardrobe to such. In other words, layer! Mornings and evenings are quite chilly, while the afternoon is too warm for a hoodie, but not warm enough for anything that involves showing skin.

This is a perfect example of Georgia in the fall. Jeans, a button up or long sleeve shirt, and a thick knit cardigan. Bonus points for the hat, but it isn't really necessary during the day.

Yesterday I have discovered that some of my readers are not from the USA, and for that I am elated! Those of you who have not been to Georgia, I would like to show you what a typical Georgia fall looks like:

The colors are not a beautiful as the rest of the country, especially to the far north. Another thing that is typical with a Georgia fall is rain. Lots and lots of rain. Summers are normally dry, but this year has been the wettest summer we have had in ages. So far, it hasn't rained like normal, but we aren't safe yet.

The best tip I can give someone who is visiting Georgia in the fall is to bring clothes for every weather condition. It could be hot one minute and cold the next. Whatever the weather is in the morning, it will be completely different by that afternoon.

I love fall, I really do. It is full of traditions and gatherings, food, and festivities. The South is known for it's hospitality. I believe that is enhanced during the fall. No matter what city's fall festival you are in, you will feel like you belong. I encourage you to come visit my beautiful state and see what Georgia has to offer.

Facts About the South: How to Dress

Since I haven't posted about clothing lately, I thought today would be a great chance.

In Georgia, fall does not always mean cool days, beautiful leaves, and bonfires. If you were to have a bonfire in October, you would have to wear bug spray. In the south, we have different seasons: almost summer, summer, still summer, and Christmas. We consider winter as December to February because it is normally the only time the temperature is actually below or right at 45 degrees.

Due to this season when the leaves are still on the trees and it is cool enough to wear something other than a tank top, our fall fashion is different than the rest of the nation. Typical ensembles you would see are:

               

    

Clothes in the South don't just say a lot about you, they also tell your history. If you dress like these girls in the last picture, people will say you are a "Yank" (slang for Yankee, generally meaning someone not from the South) or you live in the city. Southerners from the city are NOT your typical Southerner.

          

 If you were from a well-to-do family, your style will be more polished, but not high fashion. The rest of the pictures show a laid back style, which is common. We don't make a habit of dressing up, unless your job requires it. Jeans are THE staple piece! Tights and shorts aren't too trendy unless you live in the city.

Shirts are the broadest range of style in the South. They range from old tee shirts, to tank tops, to blouses, depending on your upbringing. Mostly, we wear boots of some type, flats, or tennis shoes with either boot-cut or slim fit jeans. Flip flops signify that you are either in college, or it is summer. Skinny jeans are not as flattering on true Southern women because we tend to be curvy. The woman in the yellow cardigan standing on the street is the most common body type among Southern women.

Our accessories are a matter of preference, but tend to be towards one extreme or the other - either you wear them and they are big and flashy, or you don't. Hair and makeup are a completely different animal all together. Either your hair is perfectly in place and always looks great, or you just let it do it's thing. Makeup is a take it or leave it kind of thing. Again, this is a sign of how you were brought up. 

The absolute biggest thing to prepare for when you come to the South is pride in your team. Football is everything to everyone... except me. I am unclaimed territory when it comes to sports. If you come to Northeast Georgia in the fall, be prepared for a sea of red and black in support of the Georgia Bulldogs. Me on the other hand, I will be in the corner clinging to my guns and religion in hopes that football season will be over with soon.

Hello, my name is...

I have been give the honor of working with the youth of my church to perform a drama. We have three weeks to get it flawless and I know my kids will rise to the occasion! Last night we assigned parts, and worked through the first half of the song. Everyone is so excited!

Before we began, I had a mini-lesson on the labels we give ourselves. I asked the kids to think of one negative word they are told. I passed out "Hello, my name is" name tags and the kids wrote down their word. Some of the answers were stupid, weak, pale, misjudged, rude, and insecure. I then read 2 Corinthians 5:17

"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new."

I told the kids that these words we are called are NOT true. We are not defined by what other people tell us. We are defined by who we are in Christ. If we are saved, we are not the same as we once were because God has changed us.

I handed out a new name tag and told them to write down one truth about themselves. Some of the answers were talented, funny, beautiful, crazy, a Christian, and passionate. (That last one was obviously mine.) Next, we ripped up our old name tags and replaced them with a new and better one, just like Christ makes us better when we are saved.

The kids really enjoyed hearing this message because it isn't something that is normally taught. We don't always hear the positive in our lives. We tend to focus on the negative. Even at middle and high school age, we are already deprived of hearing that we aren't stupid or ugly.

I encourage you, reader, to speak truth into the lives of those around you. This means deflecting the lies that the world tells. Let your daughter know she is beautiful. Let your son know he is strong. Let your husband know how wonderful he is. Be an encourager.

Living for the Weekend

I absolutely cannot wait for Saturday! No particular reason except that I adore a lazy Saturday!

This weekend, I am only going to pretend to be lazy. Something my school teaches is setting goals. We have to set goals for our PACE work in order to complete the yearly curriculum. This is a great life skill to teach your children and yourself!

My goals for this weekend are as followed:

• paint at least one picture
• Mani/pedi
• clean up my bedroom and bathroom

Seems simple enough, right? Let's see if I can meet my goals.

Looking for something super fun to do over the weekend? I have a few suggestions! Whether you are looking for a romantic getaway or something to fill your time, these activities are not only relaxing, but can brighten your weekend.

1. Bed and Breakfast

This is a classic weekend getaway for you and the hubby that won't break the bank. Staying at a B&B is a great way to spend some time away from the mundane. Find one in a city you have always wanted to visit, or go out into the countryside or mountains and check out the changing leaves. It is a great way to reconnect with your spouse and relax.

2. Holiday Crafts

Fall is here at last! That means the holidays are just around the corner... and I'm not just talking about Christmas. Hop on Pinterest and get your craft on! Make some festive fall decor or get ideas for Christmas gifts for your friends. Either way you do it, it will definitely get you in the mood for celebrating!

3. Cleaning

Whoever said spring was the only time to clean out? Fall is just as bountiful. Find and take all of the clothes and other unwanted household items to a local thrift or consignment store. You could also have a yard sale, or sell items online. There could be a nice payday in your future! Get your kids involved by using the money from what they sell to buy one (emphasize only one) brand new toy.

4. Local Events

Going to a local event is a great and inexpensive way to have fun and experience your community in a new light. With fall festivals, corn mazes, pumpkin patches, and haunted houses, fall is the perfect time to get out and see what your community has to offer! A few local events for my area are:

• Washington Farms http://www.washingtonfarms.net/corn-maze/
• Coming in October: Whispering Hills Sanatorium Haunted House (which I am participating in!) https://www.facebook.com/pages/Whispering-Hills-Sanitarium-Haunted-House/180212715428144
• North Georgia Corn Maze http://www.northgacornmaze.com/
• Georgia Mountain Fairgrounds http://www.georgiamountainfairgrounds.com/

If you have an event that you would like to share, please leave a comment with the web address.

Dear Edna, Thank You.

As you may have guessed, I am a Disney freak. One of my favorite non-princess movies is "The Incredibles." Surfing through Pinterest, I came a cross this little nugget:

I would love an Edna like this in my life. Someone to hit me with a newspaper when I start to fall apart. 

The Bible refers this method of encouragement as "iron sharpening iron." A good hit to keep you sharp. Have you ever seen a sword being made? It is put through fire, then hit repeatedly until it is the way the blacksmith wants it, then into cold water to set the metal. This process is repeated and repeated until the sword is perfect. But not just any tool can be used to sharpen the iron into a sword. It has to be an iron mallet. The same material rebuffing the other to make it into something extraordinary and useful.

When someone tries to sharpen us, we say they are being judgmental or even hypocritical, because they are the same as us (sinners). Guess what though? The mallet and sword are made from the same material. What would it be like if the sword told the iron to stop sharpening it because it was iron, too. That's silly, isn't it? We do the same thing when we wrongfully call someone judgmental or hypocritical when they are trying to help you become a better person.

Sharpening someone can come in many forms: a newspaper hitting you, harsh words, or even a gentile reminder. Most of the time our pride is what is struck. When someone is sharpening you, don't think the correction is mean or judgmental. Instead use it to better yourself. After all, if the iron sword resisted the iron mallet sharpening it, it would never become a useful weapon.

Today I challenge my readers to not only to let themselves be sharpened by others, but to also help sharpen someone else.

~*Beth*~

Laughing at Circumstances

I love Christmas for every reason there could possibly be! I love the closeness of my friends, family, and church. I love the sights, smells, and sensations. I love celebrating the birth of Jesus. That is also the time I begin looking forward to my birthday.

This year, Christmas is going to be quite different for me because I am unsure of what is to come. I am unsure of my physical abilities and limitations. I am unsure of the level of pain/discomfort I will be in. I am even unsure of how the Youth Christmas play will go because this is the first year I will not be fully directing it.

Yesterday the announcement was made that the moment we (my husband and I) get back from Thanksgiving holiday the Christmas decorations are going up. That includes at the school. I want everything this Christmas season to be full of joy and peace, not sympathy for me.

As I get older, I am falling more in love with winter. The smells associated with winter are so enchanting. Peppermint, vanilla, cedar and pine, not to mention all the yummy spices and baking! I was smelling my way through a Yankee Candle Co. catalog and I was wanting everything they sold associated with winter.

One terribly amusing scent was "Whiskers on Kittens" which is a part of the My Favorite Things collection, inspired by The Sound of Music. The reason why I was so tickled by the scent is what it said underneath the fragrance title: with pure, natural extracts. I laughed way too hard at that saying!

Learning to laugh no matter the situation is a talent. A very inconvenient talent. I often make jokes about my spine and people will look at me like "Oh my gosh are you twisted?" to which I reply "You should see my x-rays!" My husband and sister get to see my dark humor in action the most.

At the same time, learning to laugh at yourself is very beneficial. It makes the issues you face a little easier, and it helps your stress level. The Bible says that laughter is like a good medicine. Research shows that when you laugh, your entire body benefits! Your muscles relax, breathing is easier, your blood pressure is lowered, and it is healthy for your heart. With benefits like that, why wouldn't you want to laugh more?!

We remember this quote from the Lion King:

Well, what about laughing in the face of our circumstances? Most women I know, including myself, like to bottle everything up. We don't want our problems to be known because we would become vulnerable. We want to put up this front that we have it all together, we are Suzy Homemaker with a perfect home, family, and life. Guess what compadres, we are FAR from it! Even that girl who you are envious of is just as imperfect and ill put together as you are. She just has a prettier mask than you.

Today I have a challenge for my readers: burn the mask! Quit putting up a front that you have it all together and be honest with the people you encounter. 

If you have a weak area in your life, ask God to help you overcome it through Him. After all, God has told us that in our weakness, He is made strong.

My story: I got married... and I got fat.

Marriage was the single greatest thing (other than salvation) that has ever happened to me. I had found the one person that God created just for me, and I for him. All my life I had dreamed of this milestone. The only problem: I had one more semester of college left.

This semester was going to be the hardest one of my college career. I would be an unpaid student teacher working at a school that will remain nameless under a teacher who will also remain nameless. This teacher was by far the most abusive (verbally and psychologically) person I have ever encountered. I sunk into a depression that lasted well past my time at this dreadful school and I began to put on the pounds. Because of her, I had to repeat student teaching, resulting in another semester of being unpaid.

Over Christmas break I was a ball of anxiety because of bills, an unknown school, and my increasing weight. My new school was heaven on earth! I was working with a teacher that I will forever admire and at a school I wish every child could attend. Before this school I had a terrible flavor in my mouth for public education, but when I left I knew that not all public schools were bad.

During all of this I gained 4 dress sizes and for the first time in my life I was in double digit sizes. this took a huge toll on my self-esteem. I became self-loathing and contributed to my depression. Also, my husband and I were eating a terribly unhealthy diet and were always on the go. I wanted to change. I wanted to fight my genetics and be skinny, but no amount of wishing could change the fact that I was a size 12.

One day while searching Pinterest, I was looking at how frail the girls were in the fashion pins. Thigh gaps, no curves, and sunken faces were in every picture. I was once that thin. I once looked good in everything I put on. I once could eat anything I wanted and not gain an ounce. My mother warned me of this day.

Then I began asking myself why. Why was this the standard of beauty? Why am I supposed to desire to be those thin little girls? Why can't my size be acceptable in the fashion world without being labeled "plus size"? Enough was enough! I snapped out of my self-loathing and started an inspiration board full of pin-up girls and quotes about loving your body. I AM beautiful, no matter what designers say!

This blog is dedicated to all of those (like me) who are accepting of their body, no matter what size they are. Women today are too self conscious about their bodies and need to be happy with the way God created them. This blog is meant to build up women and not tell them to gain/lose weight. I do encourage my readers to make sure they are healthy in their weight and lifestyle. Health is more important than being skinny or curvy.

In this blog, I will be sharing fashion, food, healthy living tips, as well as my own progress to live a healthier lifestyle. I am an advocate for curvy women so the fashion will be more focused on how to dress your curves appropriately, as well as trends and my fashion outlook. I will also be sharing some of my artistic talents and teaching tips. I hope you enjoy this blog.

~*Beth*~